Erin* had been married to Jay* for two years when he had an affair with a co-worker. She confesses that, at the time, she gave more attention to their newborn than to her spouse. ?Jay would become very moody when I couldn?t attend to him immediately. He became jealous of my time with our son and started coming home very late from work,? she recalls. ?Our son was seven months old when I noticed signs that pointed to an affair.?
It took a few more months before Erin found the courage to confront her husband about it.
?Of course, he denied it at first. But our friends confirmed seeing him with the woman in various
places. ? It was during one of their heated arguments when Jay finally admitted to having an affair. ?Although I already knew it in my heart, I was still devastated by his betrayal. I decided to leave him.?
Anatomy of an affair
Marriage and family counselor Clem Guillermo says an affair is not just about having a relationship with a person other than one?s spouse. It could also be non-sexual: an obsession with work or a car, for example, such that his time and energy supposedly reserved for his family is spent on something else.
He adds that affairs are a result of unrealized expectations and unresolved issues. ?When a person says he wants to quit the relationship, there?s already an emotional readiness [to quit],? he explains. When this happens, all it takes for a spouse to fall into temptation is meeting the wrong person at the right place and time.?
According to Guillermo, it is not true that a relationship gets damaged because someone had an affair. ?The relationship is already damaged; that?s why there is an affair,? he clarifies.
(Related story: Exploring Infidelity: Why Couples Cheat)
Source: http://www.smartparenting.com.ph/mom-dad/relationships/how-to-affair-proof-your-marriage
mexico earthquake aziz ansari aziz ansari katherine jenkins peyton manning broncos mexico city earthquake stand your ground law
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.